When the dance connection in the dance tears your heart apart: stay with yourself – and how you stay with yourself.

We discuss this again and again in Dancing Queens Team, very special connections in dance. It happens to many of us, especially in the Bachata, Kizomba, or Zouk scenes: You're dancing with someone, and suddenly there's this incredible connection. Three minutes feel like three hours, or turn into significantly more than one to three songs; the world disappears, only the two of you remain. Creativity emerges; I wasn't even aware that I could dance like that. Pure inspiration and the heart opens.

This intense connection is addictive because it doesn't happen often. My only thought: Time, please stay still, stay still. Don't let me go when the song ends, and dance another one. I reluctantly admit: Far too often I've already started to... to idealize another person, to imagine what it would be like if it went even further: “«This is the love I have been looking for».”

Just as quickly as the feeling came, it disappeared again: He or she hugs me, thanks me for the bachata, and on to the next one. Or he adopted to the phrases "I absolutely need to have a drink" or "I need to smoke".

And so he/she disappears from your sight. For you, or at least for me, it feels like your heart has been ripped out. Strange feelings of jealousy These feelings arise when this person experiences the same connection with someone else, or at least it seems that way – I catch myself watching where this person is dancing. Inwardly, I think to myself: Is this really happening? Back to reality – I've often wondered: Why does it happen that you fall in love with, or at least develop a crush on, your dance partner?


I want to show you: You are not the only one this happens to. And most importantly: You can learn to enjoy the magic of the dance partner connection without getting lost in the abyss that follows.

Attention: This text is based on our own thoughts and feelings in Dancing Queens The team was formed – from conversations with us, but also with customers, friends, etc. It's important for us to make one thing clear:

Any feeling on the dance floor is okay.

The important thing is not to project your feelings onto others or impose them. And to be aware that not every feeling you have will be mirrored in the same way by the other person. Be honest with those around you – and with yourself. Enjoy the connections you make with your dance partners, because there's hardly anything better. But also pay close attention to your own feelings and make sure you're doing what truly makes you feel good.